week 39 + 4 days

Attack of the swollen belly!! AAaaAaaHhhh!

No but seriously, check out this week's outline:

According to my doctor "his head is very low" Tell me about it! I feel like I've got a bowling ball between my legs! Any day now... 

xo

week 39

sorry, no photo yet. Just wanted to let you know that I am still "with child" and just a little behind on photos...

Think good thoughts for me.

xo

and you're invited!

Dear sweet baby Ray,

We're planning a really fun birthday party and it would be great if you could be here for it! 

We're thinking sometime this week. Do you think that will work for you?

xo love xo, 

mom and dad

for the birds

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

life is good.
xo

week 38

Look at that thing! When I look at this picture I can't help but think "well no wonder I feel like I am going to tip over!" And "For God's sake someone help that poor woman!" I especially love how the flash on the camera accentuates my stretch marks...
We had a BUSY weekend. We got all of my studio stuff moved out to the garage, we found and bought a crib and all the necessary bedding. We bought diapers and wipes and onesies and blankets and all kind of cute cute cuteness. We bought a birthday outfit for the little man (my favorite) a light blue, bamboo, sleeper thingy (I'm still getting used to all this new lingo). It is soooo soft, I would like one for myself! My hospital bag is in the process of being assembled (hey, that's better than not having one) And today I think I might just paint his room...

So any bets?
My husband was thinking Wednesday, but now he's changed that to this weekend. I thought Mother's Day all along would be perfectly cliche. The doctor ~ no news yet, I have an appt. tomorrow. So now it's just wait and see!

Here's my personal big belly 101:



xo

steady. aim. fire.

Lately I feel like every day is a battle.


I feel like I have to fight to get my body to do what it once did on it's own.
I have to fight with my clothes to get them to fit.
I have to plead with my belly to make my stretch marks quit itching.
I have to bargain with my hips to get them to hold me upright for just one more day.
I have to appease my stomach and find something healthy to eat all. day. long.
I have to apologize to my feet and my ankles when they are swollen and aching at the end of the day.

I feel like I am racing against the clock.
I spend all day willing myself to get things done and at the end of the day I am exhausted.
I feel like I am in a constant state of hurry up and wait.
I really hate that feeling.

More so, I feel like I have an audience.
A whole gymnasium full of people cheering me on while eagerly awaiting the next morsel of news.
I don't like discussing my cervix with strangers.

I feel like everywhere I go, people are staring and I hate being the center of attention.

I feel like a wild animal. I feel like I need to dig my den and disappear until the baby is born.
It's not that I don't want to share our joy with anyone. I'm just feeling a little too exposed and very protective right now. I know that there are no explicit expectations of me but I can't help but feel the pressure of everyone watching and waiting in the wings.

Maybe I need a vacation.
Maybe I should go back to bed.

xo

week 37 + 3 days

xo